TRUE STORY: AUNTY PRISCILLA, PLEASE SHOW ME THE WAY!!
A true life narrative.
In the past decade, several people especially acquaintances and younger colleagues have requested of me to ‘Show Them The Way’. Sadly, very few of these persons are willing to undergo the entire process of the “Way” they desire. They focus on the glitz and glamour associated with my work and refuse to acknowledge or associate with its inherent struggles, processes as well as its risks and challenges.
I began BraveHeart Initiative (BH) at age 18 (Year 2002) as a teenage girl in a rural community. BHI was then known as Voice of the Zionites and operated as a youth led, youth focused, faith based youth development club. We only programmed during the main holidays as our target population were secondary school students and we needed an ample opportunity to reach them in large numbers. Our activities were executive during the Easter Holidays (April), Long Holidays (August) and Christmas Holidays (December).
I had my first seminar on the 26th of December 2002 at Evidence of the Gospel Church Igarra and I launched a handout on how to ‘Ensure proper communication between parents and children’. I had conducted a needs analysis and discovered a huge communication gap between parents at Akoko-Edo LGA and their children.
I continued mobilizing and organizing for youth issues. I was opportune to participate at an HIV/AIDS Counselling Training by GHAIN which was facilitated by Augustine Owolabi (Alafia Hospital, Igarra). I then actively became an HIV Peer Educator in my community and organized series of HIV testing exercises for In and Out of School young people.
At age 19, I got admission into the Federal Polytechnic Idah, Kogi State in Year 2003 and I was there until Year 2005 as a part-time student. During this period, my sister (Bridget Osakwe) provided me with publications from an organization called Project Alert. Those publications titled – Breaking the Silence – shaped my life and initiated me into the fight for gender equality. I was an avid reader and digested the contents of those publications which set fire in my bones to end such monstrous violations of women’s rights. One particular story was a report of gender based and domestic violence that occurred in a community (Enwan) and it struck a chord because that community was very close home unlike many of the other stories which occurred in faraway cities.
In 2006, after my National Diploma Program, I needed an institution for my one year Industrial Training as such I travelled to Lagos with the intention of working as typist in a business centre. My sister (Bridget Osakwe) spent over two weeks dissuading me from that mission of working as a typist and mandated me to rather volunteer in a women’s rights organization. I wanted the business centre for economic gains as I hard a tough time coping with financial challenges during my National Diploma period at the Polytechnic. My sister was however keen on assisting me build a career and improving on the pet projects I had begun at our community.
I eventually went for the entrance interview at Baobab for Women’s Human Rights at Ojudu, Lagos. They asked so many questions and I wonder why stress me so much if I was going to volunteer my services. My application was accepted and that became the journey of my professional life as a Women’s Rights Defender. Sindi Medar-Gould (blessed memory), Bose Ironsi, Bunmi Dipo-Salami, Ngozi Nwosu-Juba, Chibogu Obinwa and many other feminists in that organization invested time in educating me. I completed my volunteering term at Baobab but kept in touch with almost everyone. I would write reports of my projects at Igarra and email to them and I began seeking admission into the University to further my education.
In 2007, I received an email about a National Youth Consultation on Feminism. I wasn’t publicly identifying as a feminist as I was still ruminating on the entire concept. During my working period at Baobab, I had met Bene -Madunagu, Bisi Fayemi, Ayesha Imam, Funmi Balogun, Funmi Olonisakin, Asmau Joda and a couple of other feminists who threw me off balance by their assertive intelligence on the subject matter of women’s rights as well as courageous stories of their feminist struggles in Nigeria and Africa. I studied the email clearly and then applied for the consultation and I was selected. I was offered reimbursement of air travel but I was too poor to even raise the money, so I travelled by road. Even the money for road transport was offered by a senior mentor (Febisola Owolabi -Alafia Hospital, Igarra).
I arrived Abuja safely for the National Youth Consultation on Feminism and I participated actively. The consultation was organized by the International Women’s Health Coalition (IWHC), NewYork in collaboration with Girls Power Initiative (GPI) Nigeria. I met Nura Maa’ji, Titilayo Obaoye and several other amazing young people. I also met Grace Osakue (GPI - Benin-City) and Lyn Messner – (IWHC). Lyn Messner took special interest in me and took a profound step of requesting that I be mentored by Grace Osakue. (Kindly note that both Lyn-American and Grace sit on BHI’s Board of Trustees today).
Prior to the consultation in August, I had transformed Voice of the Zionites to a formal organization named BraveHeart in April same year. I shared all the amazing work that we do at BraveHeart during the consultation and the organisers were in shock by the courage and foresight of a 23years old girl from a rural community. The consultation changed my life for good and brought a lot of positive wins for BraveHeart Initiative. I heeded to the counsel of Lyn Messner and relocated to Benin-City for internship at Girls Power Initiative.
My secured admission to Ambrose Alli University, Ekpoma – Edo State, Nigeria and I had to leave GPI and resume school, but GPI had impacted me very strongly that I took the wealth of knowledge to my campus. I studied Political Science from Year 2008 to Year 2011 and my exploits while in AAU are subjects of public knowledge. While in the University, I continued to run BraveHeart Initiative and shuttled between Ekpoma and Igarra.
During my 100 level, I was invited to participate at the African Feminist Forum in Uganda. I took official permission from the school authority and travelled with the hope that I will return before the commencement of examinations. I didn’t know that the General Studies (GST) were written one-week before the main exams. I missed my GSTs but didn’t disclose to my family members as they prioritized my academic wellbeing over my career. I did a resit in my second year and passed both courses.
In my third year, I travelled to Lagos as part of the Coalition of the Defence for Sexual Rights (Dorothy Akenova, Joseph Sewedo-Akoro et al) to advocate for an SRHR Law) and planned to return early enough to write a favourite course (POS 301 – Political Thought). My flight was delayed, and I missed the examination. I cried profusely but I was consoled by my colleagues. In my final year, I took a resit and passed the course.
Despite my hectic schedule, I never failed any course. My carried-over courses where all courses in whose examinations I didn’t sit for. However, in my final year, I made a pact with my then Head of Department not to travel during any examinations. In fact, I limited my travels and focused more on my academics and church activities. I was a very studious student who read widely, and I was consistent with my classes and assignments. I developed interest in Sociology and regretted not to have chosen it as my course. It is a very interesting and empowering course and I made friends with a lot of lecturers in that department (Emily Ebalu, My dearest Prof. Omorogie and many others). I also liked a lecturer in Economics Department (Prof. Imahe) and another in Public Admin. (Mr. Osumah). I was popular across the faculty and notorious for my condom demonstration and education sessions as well as my feminist conversations.
From the closure of the National Consultation on Feminism in 2007 until 2012, BraveHeart Initiative enjoyed institutional support from the International Women’s Health Coalition in New York. They offered us small grants, but which were very instrumental to our continued existence and operations. In, 2009, IWHC solely funded BraveHeart Initiative’s registration with the Corporate Affairs Commission in Nigeria making us join the league of nationally recognized and accredited NGOs in Edo State. They also funded Sexuality Education Outreaches in Schools within Akoko-Edo LGA. I benefited from travel grants to the US and other African countries. My first trip to the UN-CSW was fully funded by them and that trip remains an unforgettable experience in my herstory.
In 2011, while preparing for my final examinations in November, I was awarded by LEAP AFRICA. They had done an evaluation of my work at BraveHeart and gotten interested on not just the Sexuality Education Outreaches but our RAPE INTERVENTIONS. A month after the LEAPAFRICA Award, BraveHeart Initiative got awarded by the Federal Ministry of Youth and Sports Development as an Anti-Rape NGO Champion for Nigeria. It was an institutional award and not a personal one, so it meant a lot to my team.
All these years, I have been very vocal in national meetings and conferences. I usually volunteer to assist with logistics so that I can meet many people and share my work at BraveHeart Initiative. Dr. Babatunde Ahonsi (then of Ford Foundation, Nigeria) developed interest in mentoring me and provided many travel opportunities for me. I was not even aware of his role until later years.
Uwem and Nike Esiet of Actional Health Incorporated took personal responsibility of pushing my work to the limelight. With their support as well as Ford Foundation, I participated at the 3rd, 4th, 5th and 6th African Conferences on Sexual Health and Rights - Abuja (2008), Addis (2010), Windhoek (2012) and Yaoundé (2014).
In December 2011, I got a travel grant from UNFPA-Nigeria to participate at a Post-MDGs Global Consultative Meeting in Turkey where I met Prof Ladipo (Nigeria) and Judith Helzner of MacArthur Foundation (Chicago). Prof Ladipo became a father and have been very supportive of my career. Judith sent in a strong recommendation letter to Dr Kole Shettima in Nigeria and that established my links with the country office.
BraveHeart has benefited immensely from MacArthur Foundation, Ford Foundation and UNFPA-Nigeria over these years. None of these donor agencies have provided project grants to BHI but they have provided travel grants, technical assistance, institutional support and UNFPA has consistently provided BHI with BCC materials and products (condoms).
I will like to mention that Girls Power Initiative, Benin City and Women Friendly Initiative, Abuja has been of tremendous institutional support to BraveHeart Initiative over these years.
In 2012 at age 28, I got the Institute of International Education (IIE) study grant from Ford Foundation to participate at the Sexuality, Gender and Rights Institute (SGRI) by CREA. This institute entirely changed my SRHR Programming and inspired professionalism in my human rights advocacy. Being an SGRI-Alumni has brought me profound opportunities and I remain eternally grateful to Ford Foundation.
In 2012, I was a Finalist of the ADVOCACY Category awards of The Future Awards which took place in PortHarcourt. I didn’t win the award, but it brought great visibility to my work. I have received several other recognitions for my work, and I am grateful to God for his favours.
From 2012 – 2013, I carried out my National Youth Service Scheme at the Government House Ekiti where I led programs at the Ekiti Development Foundation. It was a worthwhile experience as it gave me practical knowledge of the Political Science which I studied. It was also a great privilege to work directly with Bisi Fayemi and implement women focused projects.
In 2016 at age 32, I got a partial scholarship to participate at the Sexuality Leadership Development Fellowship (SLDF) of the African Regional Sexuality Resource Centre. I had made three previous unsuccessful attempts. The SLDF opened my mind to emerging issues in the SRHR field and empowered me with the knowledge to addressing them.
In November 2017, after a two year thought process and multiple job applications, I got a job as a Youth Program Officer under the The Challenge Initiative (TCI) project of the John's Hopkins Centre for Communication Program (JHCCP) in Nigeria. It was a very challenging task and my hard work was often under valued, but I continued to improve on myself. I resolved to prove my worth and sought avenues to perform better and produce results.
In March 2019, I resigned from JHCCP because of an unfortunate incident that led to the deaths of two BHI core staff. My resignation wasn't an easy decision considering the numerous opportunities that I had with JHCCP as well as the very gratifying financial renumeration. The work environment was also very comfortable and alluring.
I had three key reasons for my resignation namely - 1) Provide succour and support to the bereaved families at a traumatic period of their lives 2) Efficiently facilitate justice for Gift Alonge (late victim) and then 3) Provide leadership assistance to BHI Team for the rebuilding and recovery process.
In my 17years sojourn as a CSO practitioner, I have been graciously favoured with several mentors and I am indeed a product of mentorship. I build intergenerational bridges and invest in all my diverse classes of friendships and relationships.
I make bold to publicly identify as the adopted daughter of Lady Grace Idaehor Osakue as well as Professor Adesegun Olayiwola Fatusi. These two Nigerians have played excellent parental roles in my life and I remain eternally grateful for for their unconditional love and support.
My work comes with a lot of risks and lives are perpetually endangered. I have experienced security threat on several occasions. I often receive threat text messages and calls from unknown persons; Have been trailed and stalked on few occasions; Have been harassed by community members (survivors’ family inclusive) on multiple times; Have been apprehended and physically harassed by Police officers several times; In 2016, I suffered an attempted kidnap-the culprits were apprehended after suffering months of psychological torture; On multiple occasions, staff of BraveHeart Initiative have been physically harassed by community members (survivors’ family inclusive) and state actors; BraveHeart Initiative lost two staff while in active service – facilitating justice for a survivor.
I hope my story enlightens someone today and answers the question of ‘SHOW ME THE WAY’ that is often thrown at me.
I know that life is a journey and I am investing so much resources, time and hard work in making my own journey an impactful one.
Best Wishes!!
Ms Priscilla Usiobaifo,
The International Village Girl.
In the past decade, several people especially acquaintances and younger colleagues have requested of me to ‘Show Them The Way’. Sadly, very few of these persons are willing to undergo the entire process of the “Way” they desire. They focus on the glitz and glamour associated with my work and refuse to acknowledge or associate with its inherent struggles, processes as well as its risks and challenges.
I began BraveHeart Initiative (BH) at age 18 (Year 2002) as a teenage girl in a rural community. BHI was then known as Voice of the Zionites and operated as a youth led, youth focused, faith based youth development club. We only programmed during the main holidays as our target population were secondary school students and we needed an ample opportunity to reach them in large numbers. Our activities were executive during the Easter Holidays (April), Long Holidays (August) and Christmas Holidays (December).
I had my first seminar on the 26th of December 2002 at Evidence of the Gospel Church Igarra and I launched a handout on how to ‘Ensure proper communication between parents and children’. I had conducted a needs analysis and discovered a huge communication gap between parents at Akoko-Edo LGA and their children.
I continued mobilizing and organizing for youth issues. I was opportune to participate at an HIV/AIDS Counselling Training by GHAIN which was facilitated by Augustine Owolabi (Alafia Hospital, Igarra). I then actively became an HIV Peer Educator in my community and organized series of HIV testing exercises for In and Out of School young people.
At age 19, I got admission into the Federal Polytechnic Idah, Kogi State in Year 2003 and I was there until Year 2005 as a part-time student. During this period, my sister (Bridget Osakwe) provided me with publications from an organization called Project Alert. Those publications titled – Breaking the Silence – shaped my life and initiated me into the fight for gender equality. I was an avid reader and digested the contents of those publications which set fire in my bones to end such monstrous violations of women’s rights. One particular story was a report of gender based and domestic violence that occurred in a community (Enwan) and it struck a chord because that community was very close home unlike many of the other stories which occurred in faraway cities.
In 2006, after my National Diploma Program, I needed an institution for my one year Industrial Training as such I travelled to Lagos with the intention of working as typist in a business centre. My sister (Bridget Osakwe) spent over two weeks dissuading me from that mission of working as a typist and mandated me to rather volunteer in a women’s rights organization. I wanted the business centre for economic gains as I hard a tough time coping with financial challenges during my National Diploma period at the Polytechnic. My sister was however keen on assisting me build a career and improving on the pet projects I had begun at our community.
I eventually went for the entrance interview at Baobab for Women’s Human Rights at Ojudu, Lagos. They asked so many questions and I wonder why stress me so much if I was going to volunteer my services. My application was accepted and that became the journey of my professional life as a Women’s Rights Defender. Sindi Medar-Gould (blessed memory), Bose Ironsi, Bunmi Dipo-Salami, Ngozi Nwosu-Juba, Chibogu Obinwa and many other feminists in that organization invested time in educating me. I completed my volunteering term at Baobab but kept in touch with almost everyone. I would write reports of my projects at Igarra and email to them and I began seeking admission into the University to further my education.
In 2007, I received an email about a National Youth Consultation on Feminism. I wasn’t publicly identifying as a feminist as I was still ruminating on the entire concept. During my working period at Baobab, I had met Bene -Madunagu, Bisi Fayemi, Ayesha Imam, Funmi Balogun, Funmi Olonisakin, Asmau Joda and a couple of other feminists who threw me off balance by their assertive intelligence on the subject matter of women’s rights as well as courageous stories of their feminist struggles in Nigeria and Africa. I studied the email clearly and then applied for the consultation and I was selected. I was offered reimbursement of air travel but I was too poor to even raise the money, so I travelled by road. Even the money for road transport was offered by a senior mentor (Febisola Owolabi -Alafia Hospital, Igarra).
I arrived Abuja safely for the National Youth Consultation on Feminism and I participated actively. The consultation was organized by the International Women’s Health Coalition (IWHC), NewYork in collaboration with Girls Power Initiative (GPI) Nigeria. I met Nura Maa’ji, Titilayo Obaoye and several other amazing young people. I also met Grace Osakue (GPI - Benin-City) and Lyn Messner – (IWHC). Lyn Messner took special interest in me and took a profound step of requesting that I be mentored by Grace Osakue. (Kindly note that both Lyn-American and Grace sit on BHI’s Board of Trustees today).
Prior to the consultation in August, I had transformed Voice of the Zionites to a formal organization named BraveHeart in April same year. I shared all the amazing work that we do at BraveHeart during the consultation and the organisers were in shock by the courage and foresight of a 23years old girl from a rural community. The consultation changed my life for good and brought a lot of positive wins for BraveHeart Initiative. I heeded to the counsel of Lyn Messner and relocated to Benin-City for internship at Girls Power Initiative.
My secured admission to Ambrose Alli University, Ekpoma – Edo State, Nigeria and I had to leave GPI and resume school, but GPI had impacted me very strongly that I took the wealth of knowledge to my campus. I studied Political Science from Year 2008 to Year 2011 and my exploits while in AAU are subjects of public knowledge. While in the University, I continued to run BraveHeart Initiative and shuttled between Ekpoma and Igarra.
During my 100 level, I was invited to participate at the African Feminist Forum in Uganda. I took official permission from the school authority and travelled with the hope that I will return before the commencement of examinations. I didn’t know that the General Studies (GST) were written one-week before the main exams. I missed my GSTs but didn’t disclose to my family members as they prioritized my academic wellbeing over my career. I did a resit in my second year and passed both courses.
In my third year, I travelled to Lagos as part of the Coalition of the Defence for Sexual Rights (Dorothy Akenova, Joseph Sewedo-Akoro et al) to advocate for an SRHR Law) and planned to return early enough to write a favourite course (POS 301 – Political Thought). My flight was delayed, and I missed the examination. I cried profusely but I was consoled by my colleagues. In my final year, I took a resit and passed the course.
Despite my hectic schedule, I never failed any course. My carried-over courses where all courses in whose examinations I didn’t sit for. However, in my final year, I made a pact with my then Head of Department not to travel during any examinations. In fact, I limited my travels and focused more on my academics and church activities. I was a very studious student who read widely, and I was consistent with my classes and assignments. I developed interest in Sociology and regretted not to have chosen it as my course. It is a very interesting and empowering course and I made friends with a lot of lecturers in that department (Emily Ebalu, My dearest Prof. Omorogie and many others). I also liked a lecturer in Economics Department (Prof. Imahe) and another in Public Admin. (Mr. Osumah). I was popular across the faculty and notorious for my condom demonstration and education sessions as well as my feminist conversations.
From the closure of the National Consultation on Feminism in 2007 until 2012, BraveHeart Initiative enjoyed institutional support from the International Women’s Health Coalition in New York. They offered us small grants, but which were very instrumental to our continued existence and operations. In, 2009, IWHC solely funded BraveHeart Initiative’s registration with the Corporate Affairs Commission in Nigeria making us join the league of nationally recognized and accredited NGOs in Edo State. They also funded Sexuality Education Outreaches in Schools within Akoko-Edo LGA. I benefited from travel grants to the US and other African countries. My first trip to the UN-CSW was fully funded by them and that trip remains an unforgettable experience in my herstory.
In 2011, while preparing for my final examinations in November, I was awarded by LEAP AFRICA. They had done an evaluation of my work at BraveHeart and gotten interested on not just the Sexuality Education Outreaches but our RAPE INTERVENTIONS. A month after the LEAPAFRICA Award, BraveHeart Initiative got awarded by the Federal Ministry of Youth and Sports Development as an Anti-Rape NGO Champion for Nigeria. It was an institutional award and not a personal one, so it meant a lot to my team.
All these years, I have been very vocal in national meetings and conferences. I usually volunteer to assist with logistics so that I can meet many people and share my work at BraveHeart Initiative. Dr. Babatunde Ahonsi (then of Ford Foundation, Nigeria) developed interest in mentoring me and provided many travel opportunities for me. I was not even aware of his role until later years.
Uwem and Nike Esiet of Actional Health Incorporated took personal responsibility of pushing my work to the limelight. With their support as well as Ford Foundation, I participated at the 3rd, 4th, 5th and 6th African Conferences on Sexual Health and Rights - Abuja (2008), Addis (2010), Windhoek (2012) and Yaoundé (2014).
In December 2011, I got a travel grant from UNFPA-Nigeria to participate at a Post-MDGs Global Consultative Meeting in Turkey where I met Prof Ladipo (Nigeria) and Judith Helzner of MacArthur Foundation (Chicago). Prof Ladipo became a father and have been very supportive of my career. Judith sent in a strong recommendation letter to Dr Kole Shettima in Nigeria and that established my links with the country office.
BraveHeart has benefited immensely from MacArthur Foundation, Ford Foundation and UNFPA-Nigeria over these years. None of these donor agencies have provided project grants to BHI but they have provided travel grants, technical assistance, institutional support and UNFPA has consistently provided BHI with BCC materials and products (condoms).
I will like to mention that Girls Power Initiative, Benin City and Women Friendly Initiative, Abuja has been of tremendous institutional support to BraveHeart Initiative over these years.
In 2012 at age 28, I got the Institute of International Education (IIE) study grant from Ford Foundation to participate at the Sexuality, Gender and Rights Institute (SGRI) by CREA. This institute entirely changed my SRHR Programming and inspired professionalism in my human rights advocacy. Being an SGRI-Alumni has brought me profound opportunities and I remain eternally grateful to Ford Foundation.
In 2012, I was a Finalist of the ADVOCACY Category awards of The Future Awards which took place in PortHarcourt. I didn’t win the award, but it brought great visibility to my work. I have received several other recognitions for my work, and I am grateful to God for his favours.
From 2012 – 2013, I carried out my National Youth Service Scheme at the Government House Ekiti where I led programs at the Ekiti Development Foundation. It was a worthwhile experience as it gave me practical knowledge of the Political Science which I studied. It was also a great privilege to work directly with Bisi Fayemi and implement women focused projects.
In 2016 at age 32, I got a partial scholarship to participate at the Sexuality Leadership Development Fellowship (SLDF) of the African Regional Sexuality Resource Centre. I had made three previous unsuccessful attempts. The SLDF opened my mind to emerging issues in the SRHR field and empowered me with the knowledge to addressing them.
In November 2017, after a two year thought process and multiple job applications, I got a job as a Youth Program Officer under the The Challenge Initiative (TCI) project of the John's Hopkins Centre for Communication Program (JHCCP) in Nigeria. It was a very challenging task and my hard work was often under valued, but I continued to improve on myself. I resolved to prove my worth and sought avenues to perform better and produce results.
In March 2019, I resigned from JHCCP because of an unfortunate incident that led to the deaths of two BHI core staff. My resignation wasn't an easy decision considering the numerous opportunities that I had with JHCCP as well as the very gratifying financial renumeration. The work environment was also very comfortable and alluring.
I had three key reasons for my resignation namely - 1) Provide succour and support to the bereaved families at a traumatic period of their lives 2) Efficiently facilitate justice for Gift Alonge (late victim) and then 3) Provide leadership assistance to BHI Team for the rebuilding and recovery process.
In my 17years sojourn as a CSO practitioner, I have been graciously favoured with several mentors and I am indeed a product of mentorship. I build intergenerational bridges and invest in all my diverse classes of friendships and relationships.
I make bold to publicly identify as the adopted daughter of Lady Grace Idaehor Osakue as well as Professor Adesegun Olayiwola Fatusi. These two Nigerians have played excellent parental roles in my life and I remain eternally grateful for for their unconditional love and support.
My work comes with a lot of risks and lives are perpetually endangered. I have experienced security threat on several occasions. I often receive threat text messages and calls from unknown persons; Have been trailed and stalked on few occasions; Have been harassed by community members (survivors’ family inclusive) on multiple times; Have been apprehended and physically harassed by Police officers several times; In 2016, I suffered an attempted kidnap-the culprits were apprehended after suffering months of psychological torture; On multiple occasions, staff of BraveHeart Initiative have been physically harassed by community members (survivors’ family inclusive) and state actors; BraveHeart Initiative lost two staff while in active service – facilitating justice for a survivor.
I hope my story enlightens someone today and answers the question of ‘SHOW ME THE WAY’ that is often thrown at me.
I know that life is a journey and I am investing so much resources, time and hard work in making my own journey an impactful one.
Best Wishes!!
Ms Priscilla Usiobaifo,
The International Village Girl.
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